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It should have been easy.
I needed the money. He needed a babysitter to keep him from snorting himself to death.
I was cherry-picked especially for him. Responsible. Optimistic. Warm. Innocent.
The worst part is that I should have known better.
Alex Winslow. British rock star. Serial heartbreaker. Casanova with whiskey eyes.
“Don’t get near the devil in a leather jacket. He’ll chew you up and spit you out.”
Sounds familiar? That’s because it was a headline in a tabloid the second time he got arrested.
Guess what? I didn’t listen.
I signed the contract.
World tour. Three months. Four Continents. One hundred shows.
My name is Indigo Bellamy, and I sold my soul to a tattooed god.
Problem was, my soul wasn’t enough for Alex Winslow. He ended up taking my body, too.
Then he took my heart.
Then he took my all.
Nat’s words came back and haunted me like a bad haircut from the eighties. An irrational need to check the goods took over me. It wasn’t like he minded. According to the rumors, his dick had seen more cameras than Kendall Jenner. Slowly—so painfully slowly—my eyes drifted down his sinewy body. I just wanted to see what all the fuss was about. Whatever I had in mind, though, didn’t come close to the real thing. Thick, long but not atrocious. With thin veins running through its length.
“Nice view?” he groaned, tucking his junk back into his briefs. His profile was glorious. Strong jaw, pouty lips, eyes like sex…
My eyes snapped up when I realized he was talking to me. “I wasn’t…”
“Looking? Yes, you were. Next time take a picture. It lasts longer.” He rolled his zipper upward and flushed the toilet with the toe of his boot. He turned around and squirted soap into his palm, washing his hands almost violently—rubbing between each finger and scratching his knuckles like he wanted to shed his own skin. When he was done, he looked around for a towel.
I cleared my throat, scrambling to regain my wits. “Longer than the glimpse or longer than your performance?”
Casually—so unbearably casually—he wiped his wet hands over my purple dress. I gasped, moving sideways. It looked like he was about to open the door and get out, but before I had the chance to yell at him for using me as a human towel, he slammed me against the wall, bracing both his arms above my head and pinning me to my spot. I let out a shriek of surprise at the sudden proximity.
Alex Winslow is touching me. Willingly, my surprisingly pitiful brain squealed.
Heat rolled off his body, making my back arch and my breath catch in my throat.
“Let’s make one thing clear—I could fuck you to a point of numbness without even breaking a sweat if I wanted to. Now, careful, New Girl. If you don’t keep your distance from me, I think I just might.”
About LJ Shen
L.J. Shen is an International #1 best-selling author of Contemporary Romance and New Adult novels. She lives in Northern California with her husband, young son and chubby cat.
Before she’d settled down, L.J. (who thinks referring to herself in the third person is really silly, by the way) traveled the world, and collected friends from all across the globe. Friends who’d be happy to report that she is a rubbish companion, always forgets peoples’ birthdays and never sends Christmas cards.
She enjoys the simple things in life, like spending time with her family and friends, reading, HBO, Netflix and internet-stalking Stephen James. She reads between three to five books a week and firmly believes Crocs shoes and mullets should be outlawed.
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Now. I heard that L.J. Shen’s heroes are always an acquired taste. I love them multi-layered, complicated and broken, bordering on asshole just as much as the good guys. But Miss Shen’s are supposed to be about ten steps up from those so finally getting a shot at reading one of her books had me thrilled.
Indie’s need for money makes her interview and take a job as a sobriety companion of one of the most famous contemporary rockstars. Alex is a hot mess and very unhappy about his new babysitter. All the others he bullied away. So it’s a safe bet that he will succeed with this new girl too.
Uh. Uh! Not so fast!
“When I look at you, I see something broken that isn’t worth fixing. And you look at me like I’m a cheap thing to replace the expensive one that’s been stolen from you. See, we’re all vases. And you’re the one scattered on the floor, shattered beyond repair. So I’ll let someone else pick you up. It’s really that simple. Have fun with your temporary glue.”
New Girl talks back, something he didn’t expect and that intrigues him. Soon they find each other in a dance of push-and-pull across four continents and the promise of an unhappy end. Because how else COULD it end for an unlovable dick who gets off on his obsession, a rockstar who’s addicted to addiction?
If you have an 8 billion pieces jigsaw puzzle and pick out two random pieces and they fit…that’s Indie and Alex. Indie was perfect for him. She was what he needed every step of the way, even when they went through the roughest of times. She was resilient, smart-mouthed, sassy, and what broke her, utterly selfless. She loved her family and wanted nothing more than for them to be whole again. I have a huge girl crush on Indie, without her this story wouldn’t have worked (and I’m aware that I talking about her as if she was real).
There are these people who feel too much, too deeply, too colorfully and brightly. Alex Winslow is one of those. His only way to express pain when he’s sober is being an asshole that has nothing on the assholes you’ve read about so far. Alex isn’t perfect for Indie but with her vibrant and warm personality she shapes him into the man he never thought he could be.
From afar, Alex Winslow looked like nothing could penetrate his armor. But he was an artist— and an artist’s armor is full of bullets and cracks. That’s how the lyrics and notes seep through.
If you decide to pick this up, have patience. Have patience with Alex. He isn’t mellow, sweet, endearing and balanced. He is selfish, volatile, rude and often times hurtful and callous. His rockstar status may seem dazzling, scintillating but underneath that shield of cockiness and douchebaggery is a tender heart with a bucket full of insecurities. But Alex is also charming, funny, charismatic and larger than life and it’s what makes people flock him.
“God, you’re beautiful.” And oh, was she ever. Like a painfully short, brilliant song that keeps you thirsty for more.”
Midnight Blue isn’t an easy or light-hearted story. If you expect and want that this is definitely the wrong place to look for it. It has a lot of heavy themes and deals with addiction and the death of family members. Cheerful, it is not, but it is raw, emotional, gritty, often times infuriating…God I was so mad at Alex at times. But above all it’s heartbreaking. Seeing Alex fall apart, hurting, struggling, flailing his arms as to not to drown, watching Indie getting hurt by him time and time again. I keep rubbing my chest. There is a spot that hurts where my heart is. The end made up for all the heartbreak – thankfully we get a super sweet Epilogue that soothes our raw emotions.
Her eyes— her fucking eyes— a dark spell enveloped in a sweet girl who brought so much light into my miserable life.
Dear L.J. Shen, I’m in awe of your talent. The writing is edgy, with an acute eye for detail. I loved the sass and humor, how it made me feel the whole range of my emotional scale and I’m definitely going to read your back list. Because I am an addict, too.